Tuesday, September 1, 2009

About eleven years ago, Rob called me from San Francisco to tell me that he had fallen in love. His cousin from Oklahoma had come for a visit and. brought her friend, Leigh.
It happened fast.
He said, “Mom, when I look at her, I feel like I’m going to vomit.”

He always did have a way with words.

They were married on June 24th, on Richard’s and my thirtieth wedding anniversary. They spent the next ten years mostly unaware that there were other people in the world. They never made it past that “puppy stage.” They did everything together, and I mean everything. Rob couldn’t read if Leigh wasn’t reading. He couldn’t sleep if Leigh wasn’t in bed with him. He couldn’t work if Leigh wasn’t working with him.

Yesterday they took Leigh off of life support. After about an hour she began to change. She doesn’t look like herself. She gets older by the minute. She’s living the rest of her life quickly.

I hope for today, she stays away from the light; just until after midnight.
Today is Rob’s thirty-seventh birthday.

I Had Only Known
Reba McIntyre
If I had only known
It was the last walk in the rain
I'd keep you out for hours in the storm
I would hold your hand
Like a lifeline to my heart
Underneath the thunder we'd be warm
If I had only known
It was our last walk in the rain

If I had only known
I'd never hear your voice again
I'd memorize each thing you ever said
And on those lonely nights
I could think of them once more
Keep your words alive inside my head
If I had only know
I'd never hear your voice again

You were the treasure in my hand
You were the one who always stood beside me
So unaware I foolishly believed
That you would always be there
But then there came a day
And I turned my head and you slipped away

If I had only known
It was my last night by your side
I'd pray a miracle would stop the dawn
And when you'd smile at me
I would look into your eyes
And make sure you knew my love
For you goes on and on
If I had only known
If I had only known
The love I would've shown
If I had only known

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