Tuesday, September 1, 2009

September 25
Not much has changed. The doctors say to be patient, but that is a very difficult doctor’s order to follow. Her body has to heal itself, and nothing else can be done other than the antibiotics and the life support.
She opened her eyes today but her pupils are fixed and she doesn’t track, so the nurses and doctors in the ICU don’t give the event much importance, but we celebrated. We are grasping at straws, here.
When Leigh came to them she was “Moment to moment” so they let us in whenever we wanted, which was all the time. Now that they have her somewhat stabilized, they say they are going to start following the ICU rules. I have a plan to bake them my killer chocolate cake so they will like me enough to let me in whenever I come.
There is something called a coma scale. It starts at 3 and ends at 10. (I am learning so much.) Leigh came in at 3 and is now at 4 and they expect her to stay there for some time.
Rob is still beating himself up with guilt over what he thinks he didn’t do right. He says he accidentally blew barf into her lungs when he was giving her CPR. (Nurse said that is normal.) He said he stopped giving her CPR when the paramedics got there and they didn’t start it right away. He said he wanted his lunch early. (If he hadn’t been there he would have come in an hour later and found her dead.) He said he was grouchy at lunch. He just wants Wednesday back. He just wants Leigh back. He keeps whispering into her ear, “Leigh, I love you so much. Please come back to me, Sweet Baby, and I will take care of you.” It is tearing my heart out. I want to rock him like I did when he was little.
I am in awe of the power of a circle of friends. Thank you for your words of encouragement and your prayers. It means more to me than you’ll ever know.

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